Dear Kathi,

I have three children, ages 17 through 26 years. I have school papers, craft projects, tests, newspaper articles, etc. that I’ve kept for over 20 years. They are in storage boxes (not secure, tight boxes though) in the attic. What’s the solution to all this stuff? Laminated top -loading sheet protectors in binders?

Thanks,

Sherree, Lake Hodges

Sherree,

The solution will be based on your ultimate goal, on the reason you kept these items in the attic for so many years. Did you want your children to have keepsakes of their own? Was it simply your motherly duty, or did you keep them as a reminder of your, and their, younger years?

Regardless of the original reason, I would suggest that you pull everything out of the attic and sort by separating each child’s papers.

If you kept them for yourself and now wish to create a memory book for your own satisfaction, divide out the keepsakes you want to incorporate into a book or books. Even if these are for you for now, you might want to create a separate book for each child so that you could pass it on to that child later on. Make sure each book includes a section with a few photos of their siblings.

Laminated top-loading sheet protectors will probably only work for half of the archived papers, as many art projects are larger than the 8.5 x 11-inch format. Large format (11×17) scrapbooks are more fun. You have room for much more creativity on a large canvas.

If you saved these papers for your kids and don’t wish to make scrapbooks, separate each child’s items and place them into individually labeled plastic bins with snap on lids. Plastic bins will preserve the papers for a longer period of time than cardboard boxes. Cardboard is never a long-term archiving solution because insects are attracted to the glue used in the manufacturing process.

Trophies can be dismantled by peeling off the etched plaque, which can be stored in a book or framed with a photo. I have witnessed too many broken and armless trophies to realize that storing them for years is not the answer. Trophies are bulky and not worth their storage space. A better strategy would be to photograph your child holding the trophy while wearing the uniform. Peel the plaque and affix it to the photo in an album.

For readers with school age children, I recommend buying each child an under-the-bed box. Store a box under each child’s bed. Throughout the year, add papers and memories. Every summer, go through the box with your child and decide what they wish to keep and what they want to discard. Make sure to conduct the box evaluation with your child. It is a valuable life lesson for them to learn about memories and possessions.

By the end of their school years, they will have one box of their best childhood memories and not a lot of luggage from the past to tie them down as they forge ahead living their lives in the present moment.

If you are worried that your child will discard the art that is really precious to you, start your own archive box with the truly special pieces. Limit yourself to one under-the-bed box for all children combined! Remember that memories are made from special moments in time, not necessarily from tangible possessions. No one can take a memory from you, nor is a memory contingent on saving a specific item.

Collectibles, clutter and stale energy

Dear Kathi,

How do you get started when organizing seems like a big elephant looming in the background? I have so many things going on in my life and I have many different images. At work, I spend my energy trying to please other people, I come home to another set of people to nurture, playing chauffeur for the kids and meeting my husband’s expectations.

I guess the real question is when do I find the time to get organized and also spend time nurturing myself? I know that everything I touch at home demands thought and resolution. If it is an item in my closet, I have to think about if I need it and if not, should I donate or consign and on and on… How can I come home and approach my items without too much mental drain?

Veodia, Oceanside

Veodia,

You present a two-fold question. You are already a step ahead because you are aware that all your possessions demand energy. Knowing this is the beginning of controlling what occupies your time and enters your living space. That is always the first step.

Once you understand that every item within your home demands energy from you, you are much more diligent about what you let into your home environment. For example, a new pair of shoes demands much decision-making; Do you need to make room and get rid of another pair of shoes so the new ones will fit into your closet? If so, which pair should you discard? If not, where will they live while not on your feet? How much did they cost? Did you have the money to spend or was it the result of a terrible day of overspending to feel better? If so, in addition to the decision energy, it’s possible that the shoes could create a guilty feeling every time you glance at them in your closet, so in the end might not be a good addition to your wardrobe. These are only a few of the examples of how possessions can zap your energy.

The easiest approach is to take small steps on a regular basis. Make a list of your intended projects. Divide these tasks into five-minute time chunks. Try to do at least one five-minute session every day. Choose a regular time based on your family schedule. Stick to this pre-determined time as close as possible every day. Some moms can steal five minutes when they first arrive home because the kids aren’t home yet. Some moms can focus for a few minutes just before sleep because the house is quiet. Whichever time works for you is fine as long as you commit to this standing appointment with yourself every day.

You can accomplish a lot in five minutes. Some nights you might be able to focus for 10 to15 minutes and other nights it will be all you can do to focus for five. Even if it is only five per night, you will see a shift and your elephant of chaos will shrink down to a mouse. Results inevitably happen with consistent effort.

The same holds true for nurturing yourself. Commit to spending at least fifteen minutes a day doing something only for you. Maybe it’s simply a soak in the tub, curling up with a book, or sitting in the park for a few minutes on the way home form work. Again, with consistent daily quiet time for yourself, you will feel less overwhelmed. Your family will benefit greatly from your time spent alone. You will be more effective at work, as a mom and as a wife when you give yourself daily quality quiet time to nurture yourself.

I would also suggest planning a pre-designated night out with your girlfriends or colleagues. If possible, create a schedule that contains a once-a-month free night for you and a free night for your partner, taking turns spending time away from the family.

It is also very important to build in a date night at least once a month where you and your husband can spend time catching up and nurturing your relationship together. These nights sometimes require a lot of energy to coordinate but always pay off in the long run.
Thanks for writing and don’t hesitate to write with any other specific questions.

Please submit your questions to: advice@addspacetoyourlife.com

San Diego Professional Organizer